Razzing Herman

"My niggahs"

Oh Herman Cain. According to you, liberals come to my house with briefcases containing doping serums and spinning wheels with black and white patterns on them that create hypnotic whirls when rotated. They overpower me, tie me up, and apply their paraphernalia while chanting "yoooooooou wiiiiiiiiill vooooooooote liiiiiiiiiberaaaaaaaaaal" until I am effectively in their power. It sounds ridiculous, but Herman feels he has to pile on the kook-ology to stand out among this year's crop of Redubyacans. Either that or he's been called an Uncle Tom by one too many black people on the campaign trail (not that I agree with that seeing how Uncle Tom died protecting other black people). 


Back in 2004, the Redubyacan party brilliantly birthed a pernicious rumble that the Democratic party takes the black vote for granted. If Redubyacans know anything about black people it is how easily many of us jump on the bandwagon of victimhood. That line gained traction with some black groups who simply repeated it like they were repeating JayZ lyrics. That was until Al Sharpton gave his address at the Democratic National Convention explaining the logical history between the Democratic party and the black voter. I remember thinking that Sharpton had put the issue to bed. Everyone in the hall was on their feet when he capped off his speech with the words "and I'm gonna ride that donkey as far as I can." No one would ever try to play this trick again, right?


In a strange twist of events, this identical strategy is being dusted off and repurposed by a black Republican. Though Herman Cain will never be president, his inflamat-oratory can not go unanswered. 


Fact is, the reason that blacks had to fight for equal rights in the first place was due to what I call the most successful and insidious PR campaign in human history. In order to get everyone in America on board with slavery, all Whites had to be convinced that Blacks were intellectually inferior and could not function as free individuals. People had to be convinced that slavery was all Blacks could handle. The partisan's reward in this philosophy was that being white automatically gave them stature above others.


During each debate America has had over allowing Blacks another increment in the quality of their lives was one side that clung to the promise of that PR campaign. Their excuses have gone down in the history that people laugh at: It's not the right time, they just don't have what it takes, this is socialism, etc. Tones of those same arguments can still be heard today. That is why I love the topic of Affirmative Action which conservatives always assume means giving a position to an unqualified minority. Just ask Pat Buchanan who complains every time a minority or a woman is nominated to the Supreme Court. In each case he refers to them as "an Affirmative Action hire" with derision. Buchanan admits that minorities have been victims of unfair treatment, and because of this unfair treatment, they are inferior to white people. In his mind, any Black or woman on their way to  the Supreme Court is taking away a job that should go to a white man.


The fact is that throughout our nation's history there have always been motivated black people who have been optimistic dorks (taken from an episode of "The Middle" I just watched) who realized tremendous achievement by any measure in spite of being told they couldn't or shouldn't. Regardless of how capable they were, there were limits to how far they were able to go. Even with his Nobel Peace Prize for Middle East peace negotiations, Ralph Bunche could not have run for U.S. president. Bunche and the many thousands like him contradict Buchanan's monolithic portrayal of black fraudulence whether or not he knows their story.


As for incompetents, they come in all colors yet when a white hire turns out to be a dud the Buchanans view it as merely unfortunate. When a a black person turns out to be a dud, it is elevated to the level of an Affirmative Action crime that the job did not go to a white dud or better. 


I won't mince words. It is not the liberals that assume their black workmates are stealing a white person's job. That is the realm of the conservative (not all), still, in this day and age. Google "Affirmative Action sucks" on your independent study and you will find a healthy horde who attempt to portray how 13% of the population is taking away jobs that rightfully belong to white people who are, by their estimation 100% qualified (?). Let me be clear; these are not people who would ever say anything that wasn't repulsive about Nancy Pelosi.


I'll build my monolith even taller by saying these same people have complaints that go beyond the workplace. Many of them freely associate Blacks with guilt and so champion garbage policy like racial profiling. I won't fake naiveté and insist that black crime is a myth, but I watch "Cops" from time to time. Enough said. 


A big reason that black people "vote liberal" is because Democratic liberal politics in recent history have had a legacy of eliminating supremacy, and/or establishing equality. A big reason black people "vote liberal," Herman Cain, you dumb fuckhole, is that black people ARE liberal. Unlike your portrayal, we are not doing anyone else's bidding. The suggestion that Blacks are incapable of having a liberal bent on their own is racist. When you break down Herman-ese, it sounds even more racist than the crap Pat Buchanan says. 


Cain probably thought he could get away with saying what he did because he's got black skin. It would have been far less offensive if he had used the nigger word.